BEE-BEE

There was a father a mother and their three sons.
It was Thanksgiving day, so the father went out
with his bee-bee gun to the farm to shoot a
turkey. He loaded his bb gun with 3 bb's and went
out and shot a turkey, and brought it home. His
wife cooked the turkey and it was time to eat.
Shortly after they started eating the first boy
jumps up and says mom can I please be excused,
and his mother said sure go ahead the family
resumes eating 2 minutes later the boy came down
screaming “MOMMIE MOMMIE I WAS PEEING AND A
BEE-BEE CAME OUT!!”, so the mother consoles him
and says its ok honey, it happens, don’t worry
you’ll be ok.” About 5 minutes later the 2nd boy
jumps up and says mom can I be excused and the
mother says sure. Shortly after that he comes
running downstairs screaming “MOMMIE MOMMIE, I
WAS PEEING AND A BEE-BEE CAME OUT!!!!!!” His
mother said don’t worry just like it told your
brother its ok.” Next the third boy says mom
can I please be excused she says sure so he
leaves and goes upstairs and a little later
he came running downstairs screaming “MOMMIE
MOMMIE” but before he could finish his mom
interrupted and said “Let me guess, you were
peeing and a bee-bee came out??” He goes, “No, I
was jerking off and I shot the dog.”
 

Exam Questions

Little Johnny missed his final exam due to the
flu, but he'd done so well during the year that
the teacher suggested to the principal that they
gave him an oral exam to make up for the test he
missed. The principal agreed so they called
Little Johnny into the office and explained to
him what they were going to do.

First the teacher asked, "Johnny, what does a
cow have four of, that I only have two of?"
Little Johnny replied, "Legs."

Next the teacher asked, "Johnny, what do you
have in your pants that I don't have in my
pants?" Little Johnny replied, "Pockets."

Finally the teacher asked, "Johnny, what is
the capital of Italy?" Little Johnny replied.
"Rome."

The teacher turned to the principal and asked,
"What do you think, should we pass him?" The
principal replied, "Better not ask me, I got
the first two wrong."